The urge to cheat in a relationship can happen to anyone, whether they're in a healthy relationship or a faulty one. If one of you is cheating or you have the urge to cheat and you're worried your relationship is heading for the rocks, it might be time to rethink the person you're with. However, if you cherish your relationship, there are some things to do instead of cheating on your partner.
Discuss the Issue
If you are really honest with yourself about your urge to cheat, you will need to sit your partner down to figure out what it is that is making you feel this way. There are so many reasons that these urges can arise. If your partner has let themselves go and you don't find them physically attractive anymore, this can be resolved by letting them know and seeing if they're willing to work on it. If not, it's possible the relationship isn't worth enough to save anyways. Other issues can be worked out as well. However, unless you are in an open relationship, it's likely that your partner will be upset by you lusting after someone else. Be delicate when talking about it and try to determine if it's something you can overcome together.
Work on Your Romance
If you've noticed that the romance in your relationship is fading, you can try to reinvigorate it before you go looking for more excitement by cheating. Try to bring yourselves back to the sex life you had when you first met. Most couples lose the fire as they stay together longer and longer, and getting bored with your sex life is a leading cause of cheating. Try to re-embrace your puppy love. Buy gifts for your partner, go to places with exciting memories. Travel together, maybe to somewhere you've both always talked about going.
If you think you need the help of a mediator, try couple's counseling. Nobody ever stops learning in a relationship, and dealing with the urge to cheat is certainly a new experience for many. If you want to preserve the relationship, it may be time to talk to an expert. Rather than cheating, find someone who can help you get back to happiness together, and maybe your urges will go away. Remember that your success with a counsellor is dependent on your willingness to work with them. So try hard to make progress, and talk to your partner beforehand to make sure they're willing to try, too.
Pros and Cons
Maybe the issue isn't as much that you're not attracted to your partner anymore, but that life has gotten in the way and made you forget why you were attracted to them. Stop and make a list of the pros and cons of your partner and your relationship. Many counsellors will have you do this as part of therapy, but it might help to do it preemptively. If you're coming up with cons that have just recently presented themselves, talk to your partner about what has changed on their end. Perhaps they're having doubts as well, or perhaps they're unaware that their actions are impacting your relationship.
Spend Time with Friends Who Support the Relationship
This is very vital if you are trying to find things to do instead of cheating on your partner. Hang out with those who love and support you and your partner as couple. This solidifies your relationship by letting you both see the pros that the outside world sees. It also reminds you that, sometimes, your cheating will impact more than just you and your partner. Hanging out together in a group also lets you both feel less isolated in your relationship. Mutual friends let you work on your relationship without having to always feel like you're fighting to stay afloat.
Keep Yourself Busy
Idleness they say is the devil’s workshop. To thought of cheat easily runs through your mind if you are not busy most time of the day. Engaging yourself with activities for each day is a sure way to erase this cheating stuff away from your head. Although at times you may feel pressured by any of your colleagues in office and be tempted to cheat with them. The best solution to tackle this is to spend quality time with your partner when you get back home, and if possible tell her to put on the sexiest dress in her closet and take her out for dinner. This is what to do instead of cheating on your partner, and this will help to make your relationship even stronger.
Fight the Temptation
If you know you truly love your partner, then you have to do everything possible to protect your relationship. Many a relationship battles this issue, and it all boils down to whether or not you feel the relationship is worth preserving and how honest you are with your partner. If you see a future, do everything you can to fight the urge. If this means spicing up your own sex life, tell your partner what you want to try. Role play, a weekend rendezvous at a hotel, anything to keep the urge at bay and keep you in bed with your partner.
Know When to Draw the Line
Be honest with yourself. Sometimes situations may become more complicated than you think they will. Don’t deceive yourself by dragging yourself through a relationship that you have already ended in your mind. And don't hurt your partner more than necessary by drawing things out. If you honestly believe you will be happier with the new object of your attention, leave your partner rather than cheating on them. Close the first door before you open the next.
Having looked at the things you can do instead of cheating on your partner, try to guide yourself through the first hint of cheating by doing as little damage as possible. So many are guilty of cheating, and it destroys so many relationships. However, if people take these steps first, much of the pain and mess can be avoided.