Love Shadows: Part 10 (The Ending)

Fifteen years ago....

Her Dad would've hated this. Everyone surrounding his casket, and even his fellow military buddies were in tears. He was a lighthearted, funny person, with the brightest smile she'd ever seen. He would've hated seeing how worked up everyone was over him dying. They should've been celebrating his legacy, not talking about how nothing would be the same without him.

"Lena! Watch out!" her older brother Leo's warning came too late, as the branch of a tree she'd been standing under broke just above her head. The sharp edge of the branch was staring straight at her, daring her to move, and Lena barely flinched. She had climbed trees all of her life, metaphorically speaking and in the literal sense. Being in the only colored family in an all white military base had been everything but easy, and being a girl in general made it that much harder to live in a world surrounded by the violence and destruction men like her father couldn't get away from. It'd been just another broken tree, just like the one that had just tried to kill her, just like the one her father, her one and only hero, had taught her how to climb.

He always told her to fight. Against anything and everyone who stood in the way. She had asked him what exactly she was supposed to be fighting for time and time again, and his answer was always the same.

Change.

Present day

"Did she ever love you?" Lena spoke into the wind blowing up against her skin as she strolled through the garden in the courtyard of the lodge. Her father had left a long time ago, but it didn't make her miss him any less.

"I made it hard for her, but she did. In her own way," her father's voice came to life in her mind and she smiled, picturing him as he was before the war had destroyed his spirit. He'd been young, with ambition and promise, and he wanted to make the world a safer place for his family to live in. Until the world had showed him just how cruel and unjust it could be.

"What made it so complicated? You still adored her, even if you couldn't show it. She must've known that."

"Imagine being captured and being tortured to the point where you barely recognize the person staring back at you in the mirror," he started as she stopped in front of a patch of gardenias and inhaled their addictive scent. "How could I possibly love her when I could barely stand the person I had become?"

Her father's voice retreated back into her mind once she heard the echo of screams flowing through the courtyard. She rushed back into the lodge and found a woman lying on the floor of the sun room, a man standing before her, fist raised in the air, ready to mangle her face. Lena impulsively helped the woman up and stood in front of her as a shield. The woman was shaking behind her, the fear paralyzing her against any action, a concept Lena knew all about.

"Walk away," Lena warned the tempered man standing in front of her, giving him another chance to make the right decision. Just like she'd done frequently with Emmett throughout their marriage. And just like that, disappointment settled within her as the man ignored her request and reached for the woman behind her to finish the job.

Lena felt the charge of anger swim through her veins but she held it at a simmer, just in time to pull the man away from the quivering woman, so she could aim her knee at his balls and her fist at his throat. He collapsed onto the floor before them instantly, crawling as he struggled to breathe through the pain. He needed to know what it felt being his wife every time he decided to inflict pain.

"Is this your wife, you pathetic coward?" Lena spat, and kicked his knee when he didn't answer. His quick nod made her smirk and she crouched down before him, gazing at him in disgust. "Does it make you feel good hurting her?" she added hastily, and he stared her, not daring to answer her, but his eyes did all the talking. He couldn't help hurting her any more than Emmett had. It was ingrained into men like them, who grew up thinking making someone else hurt would keep their own sorrows at bay.

"The police are on their way," someone mentioned behind her and she could hear the sirens in the distance as she stood up and turned to face the trembling woman. Lena could tell she wanted to rush to her husband's aid, to make sure he was okay, forgetting her own pain forming a bruise on her face.

"Walk away," she warned the woman as well, hoping she understood what she was asking her to do and watched her gaze settle on her as Lena approached her. "Pack your stuff, go somewhere far, and don't look back. If you don't, you'll end up becoming someone you don't recognize anymore." The brunette stopped shaking, and she wrapped her arms around Lena tightly.

"I'm scared," the woman claimed in a whisper, looking over her shoulder to see if her husband was listening.

"I know," Lena empathized and recalled the memory of not having anyone to confide in during her own ordeal, out of shame mostly. She couldn't stand having people pity the woman she chose to turn into. "And you'll get through it. It won't be easy and it'll get worse before it gets better, but you'll be alright."

"Thank you," she whispered shakily, her eyes sending pleading waves of gratitude before she fled the scene.

***

"Did you find it yet?" the question came from her mind, and it sounded alot like her mother. Lena's body shook slightly as she prepared herself for the woman's scolding as she entered her room at the lodge and closed the door behind her. The police had just left, and after she had given her statement, she had made a call to Elle's cell phone, asking her to pick her up. She gave in, of course, after giving her a status update on her son, who was taking a break from grieving and allowed Lily to bring him some joy with the gaming systems Dante had purchased for her.

"Find what?" Lena retorted as she began to pack her things, folding them neatly into her suitcase.

"The truth," her mother spoke again, and with it came the younger and solid form Lena pictured her in in the afterlife.

"The truth being that some of what I went through was my fault? That it wasn't just Emmett's fists hurting me, but my own willingness to do nothing about it was hurting me too?"

"Why do you always do that?"

"Do what?"

"Tell people what they want to hear instead of what they should?" her mother's accusation stopped her instantly and she felt the exhaustion slip into her bones right away, which was normal given who she was talking to.

"Did you forget you taught me how to perfect that skill, Mama?" Lena countered as she sat on the edge of the bed and placed her head into her palms.

"I never wanted it to be like this. You and me, constantly at odds. It was supposed to be different, I needed it to be different than what I had growing up," Josefina admitted, capturing Lena's attention as she tried to remember how her grandmother had been in their company. She'd only gotten to see her twice in her life, the last time being in a casket at her funeral given how their family traveled a lot with the army.

"Did she suck at love too?" Lena continued and heard her mother chuckle at her words.

"That she did. But love is a mystery no one's been able to solve. If they claim they have, they've never drowned in it."

***

Two months later....

Lena felt the nerves flowing throughout her body as she stepped up onto the stage in the Staple Hill Church, and looked down at her certificate of completion at the podium. Today was the first day of the new chapter in her life and she figured making a speech at her graduation ceremony was an excellent first step.

She'd gone through all of the recovery steps made by Liam and exceeded his expectations, along with her own. She also managed to find her true calling by opening up a local shelter for anyone who had nowhere to go or no one to turn to when they needed help in a domestic abuse situation. She offered them self-defense classes, along with therapy groups and private counseling, despite how much she ignored the process during the beginning stages of her own recovery. Liam had offered his services to her cause, and she was already feeling the change in the air as they were about to enter a new year. She couldn't wait to see what new beginnings she helped create, just like Liam had forged for her.

"My name is Lena Samuels, and I thought I had lost the person I once was before I let abuse define me," she began, and glanced at her family sitting in the audience, pausing as she waved at her son, who smiled at her with pride in his eyes. She felt herself get emotional at the thought of what they'd both been through, but she fought it long enough to continue her speech. "I felt lost, and let shame and fear keep me from my family. I didn't want them to see the mess I had become. But if there's one thing my father taught me, is that as long as you keep your heart open, you'll always have someone there to catch you if you fall off your grace. In my case, that was my son, Tony. He is the reason I joined this group. And even though I fought the process at first, I realized I wasn't allowing it to change me, to make me do and feel better," she paused again to look at her pride and joy smiling for her as he sat in between Ethan and Elle, who were also gazing at her with gratification.

"It wasn't until I felt myself hit rock bottom, and losing my mother, that I understood that change had to start with me. I had to choose to feel worthy again, and once I did, that pain I held inside for so long started to fade away and I began to form a new version of myself. Someone who could allow the love of a good man to keep her warm at night," she added, grinning towards Ethan, who'd been patient and kind and supportive towards her decision to pause their relationship and allow her to breathe on her own until she felt mentally healthy again. Once all the women in the room hollered and cheered for him, Lena smirked at how his cheeks turned red with embarrassment and he waved at them politely.

"...and her friends and family to help her keep her head above water and her feet grounded when the world tries to knock you down. In closing, I just have to say, trust wont come easy, but if put in the right hands, the change will be so swift and peaceful, you'll have no choice but to let it grow and spread into happiness. Thank you all for your kindness and for sharing your lives with me through this journey. And remember, the help you need is all around you. You just have to want it. Thank you," Lena finished and smiled at the crowd clapping for her, and for her son, who was running towards her. She caught him in her arms and hugged him tightly, kissing the top of his shaggy curls as she looked up to see the silhouette of his father, standing backstage, nodding towards her before he disappeared again.

She knew he'd never really go away. He was still a part of her life through their son, but she wasn't going to let it control her anymore. Lena knew now, this was the truth her mother wanted her to find all along.

***

"Aren't you staying?" Lena asked as Ethan stood in the doorway of her townhouse. All of her guests had just finished leaving her graduation party and Tony decided he wanted to spend the weekend at his uncle's new apartment in town. They were finally alone after months of putting their attraction on hold and Lena didn't want to let the opportunity go to waste.

"Are you asking me to spend the night, Ms. Samuels?" Ethan teased, and while she always enjoyed their flirting and foreplay, she wanted nothing more than to jump his bones as soon as possible. He wore that charcoal gray suit like nobody's business and she wanted it to be only hers from now on.

"It's Navarro, actually. I changed it back last week. But yes, I most certainly am asking you to spend the night with me," Lena answered as she placed her hands on his broad chest and he pulled her close to him before brushing his lips against her own.

"It would be a shame to turn down such a polite request," he whispered hotly against her lips, and she groaned in protest as he pulled away with a grin.

"Must you tease?" she whined and felt his laughter vibrate against her as he closed the door behind them with his foot and locked the door before he pulled her in for a sultry kiss. Pushing her up against the wall, he removed her shirt and plagued her neck with his warm kisses, jump-starting her libido as he worked on removing her jeans and the rest of her clothing. She jumped on him the moment his pants were off his legs and his thick cock sprung into action against her stomach.

He carried her upstairs to her bedroom, and sat down on the edge of her bed. She used her hands to push him down onto the bed, and began to tie his hands with a pair of handcuffs she bought from Sylvia's website. They'd spoken a few times in the last couple of weeks, even spoke about Quinn and how she had moved to the middle east to train some combat soldiers. Lena was glad Quinn had found her purpose again, and that their relationship hadn't brought too much grief into her life.

"Is this really happening? I think I've only dreamt of it a million times since I met you," Ethan joked as she finished cuffing him up and she began to reach for the whip underneath her pillow.

"I can show you just how real this is, Mr. Cavalier," she teased back with a grin and began to run the leather straps down his chest, slapping the skin on his thigh, causing him to groan slightly as her lips kissed down his abdomen. His hard erection was begging for her attention and her mouth watered as she contemplated ending her game early to indulge herself.

"You don't have to if you're not ready, Lena," Ethan warned her, and she held his gaze right before she wrapped her fingers around his cock and flicked the tip of her tongue over the head of his dick. He jumped slightly, as the hunger and lust grew in his eyes and his hips thrusted towards her.

"Let me show you how ready I am," she whispered before she took him in deep into her mouth and watched him hang his head back as jolts of stimulation consumed his body. She sucked on his cock until it swelled twice its size, then removed it just before she tasted the pre-come dripping from his tip. Lena reached for the condom in her night table and slipped it on him once she was done unwrapping it, then sank her soaking wet walls down along his solid shaft. They filled her room with lecherous moans as she adjusted to his size and then she began to ride him. She used her whip to cause pain, but soothed it with the pleasure of squeezing her inner walls around his eager cock. He was close to exploding and Lena was close to it as well as Ethan sucked and licked at her nipples, while her walls wrapped themselves tightly around his member.

"Lena, I need to see you," Ethan claimed as she looked up at him and settled her gaze on his, both of them connecting not just physically, but mentally and spiritually. She'd met this man at the lowest point in her life, and he still stuck around to see if she'd make it to the finish line. Not only did he manage to use his charm and kindness to give her hope and something to look forward to, he also gave her the strength and courage to realize she didn't need any of it to survive. He wanted her to know she'd fine without him.

But, did she want to be? Absolutely not. She deserved a wonderful man like Ethan in her life. Even if things between them didn't work out. Even if tonight was the only night they ever get to spend together. Lena wouldn't take anything good for granted again.

"I'd tell you I'm crazy about you, but I'm sure you can feel how true that statement really is," Ethan stated as he pumped into her and slowed his thrusts down once his cock exploded with his hot seed, and he brushed his lips against hers once more.

"In more ways than one," she said with a smile before she surrendered her body and opened her heart to the man who finally deserved it.