Flirting Tips for Women

Have you ever been on a "sex audition"? Do you believe flirting is the same thing as texting? The science of flirting is maintaining a balance between attracting through engagement and never seeming too available. If you have ever practiced the "art of flirting," you know what I am talking about. When a woman purposely flirts with a man she is interested in, she tends to step into character, losing the sneaker-wearing-yoga-pant-loving version of herself and amping up the 6"-stiletto-no-panty-wearing edition. This sex goddess character is on a mission, a mission to be the funniest, wittiest, and most mysterious woman she can be. From long stares and batted eyelashes to the dropping of her napkin to show off her great ass, every woman has a different method to their enticing madness. As little girls, our mothers taught us to be ladies. Keep your legs crossed, never utter profanities, and never make the first move. As we have gotten older, we have learned that lots of fun happens when our legs are uncrossed and that all of the rules of being lady-like have changed. The rules are that there are no more rules.

Flirting is an innate gift that is a combination of DNA and pheromones. We all know there are women who are better at it than others. The woman who can pull off the look of longing without looking desperate. The coy giggle that doesn’t sound like we are choking on something; it takes practice and talent. In the end, you just have to hope that they guy whose attention you are trying to get is a big surprise and not a tiny disappointment.

But since there is no way of knowing what lurks beneath their pants, we need the flirt. Some choose to simply take the up front approach and deep throat their beer bottle in the middle of the bar while others choose a more coy approach by giggling and exchanging in playful banter. While both techniques are likely to attract at least one man in the room, there are a few basic flirting rules every woman should follow.

Get Caught Looking

How will he ever suspect you are interested if you look at everyone but him? Sure, ignoring and showing disinterest is sure to pop a few boners because some dudes just love a challenge, but if you are seriously trying to pick up a man, eye contact is essential. This shows that you not only like what you see but are confident enough to get caught looking. Just like women, men want to feel wanted and what better way to show this than with an appreciative glance his way. There is a fine line between stalking and staring, so tread lightly and make sure your eye makeup isn’t running. No one likes a raccoon.

Let Him Buy You A Drink

We get it, you're independent, make your own money, and trust no one. But if you’re single and a guy you think is cute is offering to buy you a beer, just shut up and say thank you. Sometimes, being flirty means going retro; The time where the men made all the money and felt that financially taking care of their woman was paramount. Let the guy think he is in charge. And some of those cocktails can be really expensive. If after that drink you still feel inclined to show him how self-sufficient you are, return the favor and buy the next round.

Compliment Him

Women are always fishing for a compliment and, truth be told, half the time we are given one it goes unnoticed. When it comes to flirting, don’t spend your entire meet and greet searching for praise. Instead, throw some out there yourself. That is what the flirt is about—it is about him getting to like you. What better way to do that than to stroke his ego? (Especially if the goal is to stroke something else). But be careful, there is such a thing as over-complimenting, to the point where you look desperate and clingy. If he has nice tats, tell him so. If his eyes are a killer blue, let him know. Just try not to make it 25-item list of all the things you love from his head to his toes. "OMG, I just love how your big toe looks in those man-sandals," would be a no.

Be Playful

Unless you’re talking to Christian Gray himself, step away from the serious sex talk and lighten up. Part of being flirty is not talking about sex. It is all a part of the build up. This is the ultimate foreplay. Crack jokes, poke fun at each other, and definitely stay away from all religious and political convos. Even if you both are on the serious side, there is always room and appreciation for a woman with a sense of humor. Light, funny, and flirty—those are the key words when it comes to being playful.

Use Your Body

We have all seen this move in the movies, the woman who massages her date’s nut sack with her bare foot. Yeah, this is NOT what I mean. What I mean is use flirtatious body language. Expose your neck, touch your hair, push the girls up, and lean into him. Gently touch his arm, pick off a piece of imaginary lint from his pecs. Try to be the cutest version of yourself without looking like an attention seeking ho-bag.

Get To Know Him

Don’t fake it by asking stupid questions started with an overly dramatic "OMG." Instead, try showing some genuine interest in the topic at hand. Whether you are discussing sports, his family, or the weather, use your time together to learn more about how he feels. To some men, nothing is sexier than easy conversation. This part of the flirt is all about him. Whatever he is saying, just nod and smile, nod and smile. Whatever he is saying is the most important thing in the world. Because we all know that if this works out, he will spend the rest of his life listening to your bullshit. Make this time all about him and hope he has some really beautiful eyes to stare into while he is talking about something you could absolutely care less about.

Suggest a Date Idea

If we are following the antiquated rules of dating, the man is supposed to ask the woman out. This does not always work. If the guy doesn’t ask, does that mean he isn’t interested? Who the hell knows. Modern times call for modern measures. What better way to show that you are interested than by suggesting going on a date. Let’s be honest, some dudes are dumb and have no idea if a woman is flirting or simply being nice. By offering, "We should check out that new horror flick" after confirming you’re both movie buffs, you leave no room for Mr. Oblivious to miss the mark on how you’re feeling. But be prepared, if your flirting has gone the way of the cassette tape, he might simply blow you off. If he just isn’t that into you, he will probably never be into you, so count your losses and move on to the next one. He wasn’t worth it.