How Do I Know If She Will Be Into Sex on Our First Date?

It’s one of the weightiest questions that can crop up during any initial encounter. Males, driven as they are by their hormones, often begin wondering about that night’s sleeping arrangements from the moment their date sits down at the outset of the date. Perhaps the same thought crosses his partner’s mind but she’ll be more likely to be inspired by the sense of decorum that cautions against leaping into the sack at the earliest opportunity.

The problem with this issue is there are no hard and fast rules. Sometimes the partners click so well that not extending their instinctive connection to spending the night together would seem odd. Others might get on equally well, but there remains an invisible barrier at the end of the evening when it seems more romantic to make a firm arrangement for a second date, sealed with a peck on the lips.

These waters are muddied further when the question of where the date was arranged is thrown into the mix. Was it via a hot matchmaking site? A lot of couples who meet here will already have built a strong sense of chemistry before actually dating offline so they’ll be more ready to get intimate. Others get together in places like nightclubs or bars, where the atmosphere of flowing alcohol and sexy dance music almost demands people get physical later that night.

How do you know?

There are various pointers that demonstrate that a girl may be comfortable with intimacy after your first date. First of all, how were your conversations leading up to getting together? Was your chat perfunctory and to-the-point, centered on where to meet and what time? Or was there a degree of flirting going on? If you inserted a few suggestive innuendos, did she reciprocate, with interest? This in itself is not a surefire indicator as people just like making suggestive comments, and doing so within humor doesn’t automatically mean anything.

But you can get a much better idea of her intentions in person. What is she wearing when she shows up to your date? Has she opted for something sensual? Is there a lot of cleavage on display? Is her smart jacket barely concealing a lacy, camisole top? Does she regard you intensely, holding eye contact? Deliberately or subconsciously, there are many ways in which a female will use body language to send out signals. How tactile is she? Does she constantly touch you to emphasize points? Does she laugh heartily at your jokes, pretending to be offended at certain things by aiming playful blows at you?

A girl who really fancies you can employ all sorts of feminine wiles because she’s far more likely to enjoy toying with your affections than simply inviting you back to her place for a coffee. She might lean in and ask for your opinion about her new perfume, ensuring her chest brushes against you as you move closer. She could complain about having a sore back after having strained it somehow, and would you mind kneading it a little? As you perform your approximation of the delicate maneuvers a masseur would make, she might even close her eyes and begin emitting some softly appreciative moans and groans. Her vocal accompaniment might not quite reach the same dizzying heights as the famous café scene in When Harry Met Sally, but the effect will be the same.

She has given you a clear, unambiguous green light, but so much more subtle than anything you could manage.