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Tips on Giving the Best Blowjob

Let's be nasty.

I don’t like receiving oral sex. I derive no pleasure from it. I’ve had a number of enthusiastic individuals volunteer to change my attitude but I politely turned them down. I’m content with my preference because I know my body. I know what I like.

Because I’m no fan of receiving oral, I’ve spent a great amount of time studying the art of providing it. The majority of my partners have been disappointed with my rejection of their offers to me so it’s always necessary to lighten the mood. Nothing says “it’s-okay-I-don’t-need-oral” like a zealous, sloppy blow job. In seconds, that disappointment fades away.

Since I’m so experienced in the craft, I chose to endow interested readers with a few of my tips. Every person responds differently to various stimuli so do with them as you please. Enjoy!

1. Take your time.

Allow your partner to savor the experience. Don’t feel pressured to rush (unless they directly request it). Give them time to anticipate the sensation, the warmth, the wetness. It intensifies the sexual experience for the both of you and also provides you time to pace yourself. Penises are granted to us in a variety of shapes and sizes. Sometimes it requires a little practice if you’re inexperienced with a new model. (And that’s okay!) More than likely, your significant other will appreciate the effort you put forth and reward you in the end.

2. Make eye contact.

There’s a reason why POV porn is extremely popular. A number of people are aroused at the sight of their partners pleasing them orally. For some, it makes the experience more intimate. Others enjoy the aspect of feeling in control or dominant. Whatever the reason, eye contact can be very tantalizing so take advantage of it. Express how much you enjoy pleasing your partner and it will arouse them even more. If it’s the first time you both are having sex, try maintaining eye contact once and gauge their response. Some may respond more strongly than others. It’s not necessary to explicitly ask in the moment but use your best discretion. Odds are if they really like it, it’ll really show.

3. Don’t be afraid to talk dirty.

Yes, it can be awkward. But it doesn’t have to be. The key to avoiding awkwardness is being yourself. Don’t feel pressured to mimic porn stars. (Remember that they are paid for what they do). Communicate whatever feels natural to you. In some cases, your partner can discern whether or not your ooh’s and ahh’s are genuine. As with making eye contact, express yourself and gauge their response—whether it be verbal or non-verbal. Share how you feel in the moment, let them know what you plan to do for/with them, and how. Don’t be intimidated by your own nastiness. Chances are that partner shares the same sentiments.

4. Sloppy is sexy.

A blow job of any kind is a messy endeavor. But there are levels to it.

A penis’s happy place is the back of your throat. (Well, besides the other two places…) As previously mentioned, take your time—particularly if your partner is well endowed. Strive for sloppy but avoid puking (it’s a real mood killer). Begin with the tip. Flick your tongue across the head as swiftly or slowly as your partner prefers. (Again, gauge the response.) Gradually work the shaft further into your mouth. If you can multitask, stroke it counter-clockwise as you do so. Your mouth should rotate the shaft in one direction, and your hands in another. Quicken your pace occasionally; do so vigorously. Don’t forget to flick the tip every now and again. If you’re feeling adventurous, show the balls some love too. Extend your tongue down the shaft and swallow each one into your mouth gently while simultaneously stroking. If you’re working productively by this point, you will have created a slight mess. That’s a good thing. Use the saliva as lubricant for your partner (and yourself) and continue.

5. Avoid the teeth.

Your partner may not explicitly share it with you in the moment, but your teeth can be quite hazardous. In the midst of the ‘job’, it’s easy to forget how painful it can be for the other person. The roof of your mouth and inner jaws are the safe spaces. Place the shaft on the middle of your tongue and suck in your jaws. Trace the lips with the tip if you please. Just remember to avoid the teeth!

6. Show enthusiasm!

This may come as a given but I wanted to reiterate the importance. If you express your enthusiasm, your partner is more likely to derive pleasure from the experience. A great way to do this is with sounds. As with dirty talk, avoid mimicking porn stars if that’s not how you are typically. Slurping noises work wonders. Some people can climax just from the very sound of it. It sounds disgusting but it demonstrates an intense level of desire for your partner. Moan, touch/rub yourself, engage other parts of their body while performing the blowjob. These other sexual micro-expressions may make them climax even harder. Even if the ‘job’ is tedious for you, extra effort in the work will ensure it’s over in very little time. ;)

7. Swallow (and spit if you need to).

The task few people truly enjoy. (Personally, I do.) Granted, semen doesn’t have a flavor most find appetizing. But it’s phenomenal to experience a partner take in the goods. It’s intimate; it’s exciting; it’s nasty. And oftentimes, nastiness is very much appreciated. The taboo nature of the act is highly stimulating and leaves your partner with the impression that the experience was incredible for the both of you. The image of you doing so will certainly remain with them.

Good suck!

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