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When I first came on-board in the sex industry, I had no clue that I wasn't going to be paid hourly. At the time, I was hurting for money when I first got in and heard through the grapevine that you could make good money. It's true that it's possible, making stacks of cash... however there's also nights when you can make squat. I began my career in this industry at eighteen as a stripper and was told that my entire income was going to be made through tips only. Not only that, but I was going to have to tip-out other people too. I had to pay house, pay the DJ, pay the bartenders and also pay a percentage out of my profit from my lap dances and champagne rooms to the house. "Whew, well okay." I thought when I first heard this. "Let me get to work and let's see what I can do." Honestly, that's a lot of information for someone that’s brand new and never ever cared to be comfortable in debt, don't you think? I'll answer that for you—holy shit, yes.
Before all this, I naively thought that I was just going to dance and I was going to bring home huge chunks of money every night. Oh absolutely not. There were a lot of nights where I would make bank, but there were a lot of nights where I struggled so bad too. In order to stay on top of my competition, I had to learn so many ways to improve my hustle, improve my dancing, sharpen my speech, invest in more outfits, perfect my hair and makeup better, approach different clients a certain way, etc just so I can be successful, pay off everyone and bring home some cash.
Fast forward nine years later—society has been a lot more supportive of sex workers and their professions, yet we’re still struggling (may be not as bad, but still struggling none-the-less) to earn a decent living. Guys, I understand that you only have so much, too. I understand it's fun to see a naked or topless lady, but do me a favor and calculate the amount of time, money and energy we put into our craft. Sex work, whether it be stripping, camming, films, whatever—it's real work and not easy to do. So please show a little more appreciation than the "nice tits, you're so hot" comments followed by you staring at us with no tips in sight.
On that note, when it comes to strip clubs, if you're planning to go to one, don’t use the excuse that you’re only coming in to drink. In fact just don't come in without money period. You know what the deal is when you come into a club. You know better. When we’re working and you’re spending your time drinking and watching us, you may not be harming the club's business (because you paid your entrance fee and for your drinks), but you're harming our business. We live off of your tips alone. At least with waitresses or some other professions, they get some form of a check (a small one, but it's still something their company has to do). We don’t. Our paycheck is what comes from you. So please don't stiff us. It burns us out quick.
When it comes to other sex workers, say you’re watching a cam-girl. That’s cool, make sure to tip her. Even if she getting paid by the minute. The platforms that cam girls use, they receive a percentage of her money; so tipping her for her work evens out her income. Tipping is more than just a compliment or another way to say "thank-you;" it means that you’re enjoying what you’re seeing and you’re showing her respect. Anyway, so what about a phone sex operator or a film star? The platforms they use take out a percentage too. Phone sex operators do what they can to accommodate to your fetishes, kinks and fantasies. Or they’re making the time to give you advice, hear your confessions, tell you theirs or just talk to you period. They help you get off, they give you companionship, they give you opinions on bettering your sex life, relationship, marriage, etc. At the end of the day, it can honestly be a lot, mentally and emotionally—so tip them for their services.
Film stars do more than just push a button and record them getting fucked or playing with a toy. They’re doing what they can to create a nice set, act out a role, relax and film something so hot for you. So tip them. Even an escort who uses her body to please you; even if you already paid a huge price, tip her a little more. This job while rewarding, it can be draining sometimes. It doesn’t mean we hate our job, no, the hustle sometimes can just be challenging. So to appreciate an artist, an art form, to appreciate a marginalized entrepreneur, make sure to tip them. You don’t know how much we appreciate it. Even if it’s just a little bit. Trust me. A little bit goes a long way. Have you ever tipped a sex worker and she didn’t appreciate it? Well that’s on her. That’s not how all of us act. That particular sex worker is just being unprofessional. There’s plenty of us that would enjoy your gracious, financial attention. Believe me. Just think, if you'd tip your waitress, your Uber driver, your pizza delivery driver, your favorite artist, your favorite writer, then tip us too. Every little bit helps.