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Things They Didn't Tell You Before You Lost Your Virginity

In the case of heterosexual relationships, it is said that virginity is lost in penetration. In the case of homosexual relations, it is possible to think that there are three moments of "loss of virginity": the first time there is intimacy with another man without penetration, the first time there is intimacy as a passive, and the first time there is intimacy as an active.


1. Yes, that first time counts.

That first time you decided to "jump the barrier," put aside everything you learned since childhood and give way to curiosity.

It doesn't matter if they were just kisses. Much less if it were just caresses or masturbation together. It was your first time.

They never told you, but for your first time it was not necessary that there was a penetration. It was your first time where you had intimacy with another man. Never forget.

2. If you like it, you will want to repeat.

It's the law of life. One repeats what one likes. That doesn't exclude sex. If you liked intimacy with another man, you're going to want more. And if the first time was just a few kisses and a few caresses, in the future you will want muuuuuuch more.

If you liked that encounter, sooner or later you will try to force a situation like that first time.

3. Putting on the condom is not easy.

Photo by Stanley Dai on Unsplash

Maybe you've had sex with girls before but, maybe you were a "pure gay," that is, a man who has never had sex with someone of the opposite sex. 

If that was your case, no one told you that no matter how many kinds of sex education you had, YouTube tutorials you've seen, or porn movies you enjoyed, wearing a condom had its technique.

Even opening the wrapper had its technique. No one told you that you were going to be nervous and your hands would sweat so much that it would be difficult for you to open the wrapper of your first condom.

4. Sometimes it's not easy to get the hole either.

Yes... no one told you about the possibility of wasting time while looking for the access hole once the condom is in place. It was obvious to you where to find it. You never thought it could result in a whole labyrinth. Nobody told you.

5. Your partner's body fluids are normal.

It came out and the condom came out "dirty" and you weren't done yet. Maybe you were alarmed and even cut the whole thing off. No one told you it was a perfectly normal possibility. If that happened what you had to do is carefully remove the condom and change it for a new one. That doesn't always happen.

6. If your partner says it hurts... it's because it really hurts!

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

No one told you that the anus does not lubricate itself, and therefore, at first you should enter slowly. Once it is dilated, you can go at the pace you want... well, at the pace your sexual partner wants, and can.

Over time you learned that if your sexual partner is experienced, it is much easier than if it is a first-time passive, with whom you have to be more considerate.

7. You probably won't enjoy being active.

You thought your first time would be different. But it was normal. Except in a few cases, no one is born knowing how things are done, or what you're going to like about an activity you've never done before.

8. No, it's not as easy as in porn movies.

Nobody told you that porn actors are all experts in the art of relaxation. You thought it would be easy to be passive, and maybe you had to abort the action sequence and leave it for another day. You didn't know it could be so painful.

Fortunately, over time you you simply discovered how to relax, take a deep breath, and enjoy it.

9. You must learn to know when you can have sex.

Photo by Alex Suprun on Unsplash

Over time you learned to know your body, until you know when you can do it, and when it is not prudent. And you also learned that if you make a mistake and it gets dirty, the world won't end. We are human. It's just a matter of changing the condom and staying in the fight.

10. They can tell you how to do some things, but you can do it too.

Your first time was with someone experienced? But, nobody ever told you that possibly on your first time they would tell you how to do some things, and that you could do exactly the same thing.

Fortunately with time you learned that in sex it is important for both to enjoy. Not just a part of the story.

11. You can reach orgasm together.

No one ever told you that you can reach orgasm together. You thought he always came first because he was active and inside you. You believed that you would always come second.

Fortunately over time you discovered positions to allow both to reach orgasm at the same time.

12. You probably won't enjoy being passive.

Photo by Elvin Ruiz on Unsplash

As in the previous case, you thought your first time would be different. But it is normal. You had to try. Something similar applies here as in the case of being active. Sometimes nerves and inexperience make enjoyment less.

Fortunately, over time, you knew your thing was something else, or you discovered how to enjoy it. And to enjoy it a lot…

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