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Signs It's Time to Break Up

Don't ignore the warning signs it's time to break up. You'll thank yourself later.

By Jus L'amorePublished 8 years ago 5 min read
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We have all been there at one time or another, either as the "breaker upper" or the “broken up with”, regardless both positions can be difficult. For some couples, a break up may come from out of nowhere, leaving one of you distraught and confused, or perhaps the breakup will be a mutual agreement and the best decision for both of you. Looking out for warning signs is a good way to predict if you and your lover might be on the outs. You can use these signs as motivation to communicate and work through your issues or as an awakening that will finally push you to move on. Whatever choice you make, remember life is too short to spend it fighting and unhappy and even the worst relationships leave you with something; a new found outlook on life, love and most importantly yourself.

1. You're spending less time together.

Photo by Alena Beljakova

Time apart is healthy and having your own space and interests is important, but when the time you spend apart becomes more than the time you spend together (by choice) is when you may have to take a second look at your relationship. We all go through ups and downs, but ask your self this one question: The things you used to do together as a couple that you absolutely loved; do you now find yourself wanting to do those alone, with others, or not at all?

2. No more of those little intimate gestures.

Photo by Robert Saucier

If you start to notice that “good mornings” and “good nights” no longer accompany the kiss they once did or the mid-day "how's your day going" text stops coming in, consider that a warning. Little gestures like this are essential. It's also important to remember that men, and women too, are not mind readers. Sometimes they need a little nudge in the right direction.

 3. You communicate and fight less often.

Photo by Luca Bortolato

Communicating and/or fighting less is a red flag that one of you is losing the will to care. For example, if you are experiencing the #2 sign we just covered, but you don't care enough to discuss it, then you probably need to think things over. No one wants to fight, but arguments are healthy; they release feelings and solve problems. Once you start predetermining the outcome because you feel your partner doesn't understand you then you’re facing a much bigger battle.

4. There is an obvious lack of emotion.

Photo by EYLUL ASLAN

This correlates with the spending less time together and the communicating issue. Are you happier or more comfortable when you are alone? Do you notice that your man doesn't seem to laugh as much as he once did but still does with others? If you two get in a fight, are you not that upset over it or do they walk out after, something they never did before? You should be happy in your relationship and you should give a damn, if your not, then you need to revisit and revise.

5. You can't seem to understand each other anymore.  

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Do you remember a time when you used to be interested in your partners thought process and value their opinion? If you now have no idea why they do certain things (like decides to stay at work later and not tell you) or they can't understand how you possibly stand behind a certain issue (couple counseling being a positive thing to try) then it’s possible you two are simply growing a part. People evolve and views change, maybe you aren't the people who fell in love and that's ok, just get out before it gets ugly.

6. No more talks about the future. 

Photo by Christian Pitschl

This doesn't need much explanation because once you stop discussing your plans TOGETHER, then there probably isn’t going to be a "together". You should always see your relationship moving forward, whether it be an engagement, having more kids, or a buying a house with a pool one day.

7. Verbal promises stop following through. 

Photo by Sophia Sinclair

After you’ve had a meaningful conversation or argument, regarding issues that need to change, hopefully it ended with an agreement to work on things or a promise to try harder. Don't let those promises go and if you or your partner stop following through and never turn those verbal agreements into actions is when you have to ask yourself why. Why is nothing changing? Why aren't I trying harder as I said I would? Why can't they keep a promise anymore?

8. Everything your partner does is annoying. 

Photo by Corey Arnold

I like this one. Even the couples who are still in love after 50 years of marriage can relate to this phase AT LEAST once in their life, but the keyword here is phase. Everyone annoys someone and when you’re constantly around a person you start to notice the littlest things. How often is he annoying you? Is there anything she CAN do without it pissing you off? For the last 6 months of my pregnancy even the way my husband use to breathe was like nails on a chalkboard, compared to now where it’s something I don’t even notice.

 9. All you do is criticize each other. 

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Obviously, this stems from #8. It's one thing to feel annoyed over something your man does, but it’s quite another when you start bashing him for it, over and over again. Same goes for him, does he now make fun of you or even worse, yell at you for things you’ve been doing for years. Like how long it takes you to put sneakers on or how much sugar you put in your coffee. If so it’s probably time to tell jack to the hit road...and never look back.

10. Sex just isn't the same.

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I leave you with this last sign. Sex won’t always be mind blowing; in fact sometimes you will do it just so you can say you did it. We all have our ruts, but never stop caring, never stop trying new things, or the want to feel attractive. I mean let’s be realistic, sleeping with the same person for 50 years may get a bit old, but that is a part of marriage and vows. I think it’s safe to say to go with your heart on this one, because when the sizzle is gone and I mean REALLY gone, there isn’t much you can do to change that.

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About the Creator

Jus L'amore

Sometimes offensive yet mostly sweet. Always honest and often vulgar. I'm a wife, MILF, and everyone's homey. From trends and sex to mom life and fitness, I tell it how it is and not how it should be.

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