Sex in Fiction

“Cameron, we can’t keep doing this. You need to let me go,” I say.

“Bitch, you never loved me. You’re such a fucking slut. I can’t believe you, you whore, this entire relationship revolved around you!” he yells.

His tiny male brain not realizing that he made it about me all these years. The streetcar finally comes and I pay $1.25 for a safe ride home with a beautiful view of the city. As we turn, Canal Street illuminates my view as night life starts to begin. You can see the strippers, waiters, bartenders, and shot girls all get off at the next streetcar over. All of them headed to Bourbon Street on their way to work. I pull my hair into a ponytail and stick my earbuds in to isolate myself from the rest of the many tired faces, who are all ready to go home too.

"I hate you" is spray painted in bold red across my apartment door. Fucking Cameron, I’ve been here two days and I already think I need to move. Why couldn’t he just be a man and suck it up? He’s the one that’s been leading himself on all of these years. I guess that’s the effect you have on someone when you break their virginity. Yes, I was his first and he was my third of many mistakes. I pushed the idea to the back of my mind and unlocked the door. Getting my final look at the hateful message dripping of heartbreak. Not noticing that someone had been trailing behind me, watching my reaction to the message, and waiting for me to settle in.

Absorbed in my thoughts of the past few days, I start to strip down naked. A full-length mirror mounted on my bedroom wall reflected my physique, I posed as I admired myself. I’m not vain, but I loved my body. Coke bottle shaped; I honestly wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between me and Rihanna if she didn’t have that tattoo underneath her breasts. She was an Island Queen and I was an Ethiopian Goddess. I smirked as I looked back at my own self-image before heading to the shower.

Twenty two steamy minutes later,

I crossed into my kitchen as the water dripped from my hair and the air dried my wet flesh. I dried my feet sliding them across the carpet as I headed toward my wine rack, the only thing that I took the time to set up in here since moving in. The cool night air caressed my slim body as I picked out the largest wine glass that I could find, half a bottle of sauvignon blanc gone in a single pour as I filled it to the brim.

Heading back towards my bedroom, I heard a faint knock on the door. I stopped mid-step in a panic, my thoughts rushed to the thought of Cameron coming back. Fear ran up my spine balancing out the cool air from my air condition. I waited in silence, not wanting him to hear me move and swallowed the entire glass as anticipation tingled in my core. Total focus on the giant glass of wine in my hand, knowing with certainty it would be my last. He was here to kill me. I broke his heart and he was going to rip mines out of my chest for revenge. The thought alone made me cringe.

Ensuring my death, my cell phone rings from the bedroom on full fucking volume. I went to silence it, and the screen showed a text message from Lilly telling me to open the door. Breathing less anxiously, I walk to let her inside. Still naked and nervous.

“Let me guess, Cameron?” she asks, pointing at the graffiti on my front door. “You know it” I reply, as we both laugh. Her eyes began to drift over my naked body; she had seen it before, and she still looked at me like I was fresh meat. “Want a glass?” I ask, pointing to my wine rack with my backside facing her. I was giving her the view that I knew she wanted. “Yes. Cabernet,” she says in almost a whisper, her eyes now rooted in desire.

We had history—deep history. I knew her since I was six years old and she was my first and only girlfriend. I had to be her first girl—she insisted—and I was more than happy to indulge; but those were the younger days. We are much older and more mature now. We sit in silence as we drink, never an awkward moment. I turned on the ambient playlist over the speaker as we sat in darkness.

Amidst the air conditioner humming, madness and worry battled inside of my mind. The words on the other side of my door flashing like a neon sign. That stressed me out; I tried to not let that bullshit show, but that shit stressed me out. I felt like he was controlling me and I was giving him too much power by thinking about it. The relationship is over, I had won and was giving him too much of my fucking energy.

His sex was hardly memorable, barely awe-inspiring. His package was average, yet for some reason he could never hit my spot. Ever. It was just a piece of meat that gained length and minimal girth, made of flesh and blood. All of this ran through my mind, but not voiced out loud due to the continued pours of wine.

“Let’s smoke.” Lilly’s voice sang throughout my entire apartment cutting through the madness in my head, one of my favorite melodies.

I smile the hardest smile my mouth is capable of; “You know me so well,” I say. The love of my life. She knew my heart. “You get to be my first again” I tease, as I switched the playlist to reggae. She starts stuffing a king size Raw Cone. I’m tipsy, and I know it because my entire body went hot in an instant. I felt giddy, my previous thoughts seemed less relevant, and I wanted to organize. That was the giveaway. My OCD always showed itself when I was drinking. I start to shelve my remaining china and Tupperware.

I’ve been sober for three weeks, and now I have three Raw Cones sitting in front of me. Each filled with Khalifa Kush straight from California. One bottle of wine in and I’m feeling good. We each spark one, the smell illuminates the house instantly, popping my apartments' cherry. My walls sigh with pleasure as all the negative energy of the previous owner drift away with the smoke. Inhale peace. Exhale chaos. Inhale love. Exhale hate. Repeat two times.

The silent meditation is broken by a goofy laugh. Two hits and I'm already crossfaded. Euphoric vibes trace up and down my spine, allowing all of the negative thoughts and energy escape with each puff. My laugh caused her to explode into her own fit of giggles, the room now filled with pure bliss. She was the perfect cure to my bad day, the only person on earth capable of making me feel genuinely happy by simply hearing the sound of her voice. The only person who wouldn't flinch to hug or kiss me if I decided to roll in pool of mud each morning before I started my day. No intimidation. No judgements. Pure intimacy. She was my soulmate; our laughs spoke to each other's hearts. Our eyes saw into each other's soul. After two tough weeks for both of us, we were relieved to be in each other's company. We lived in our own world when we were together, created by our childhood selves, always allowing us to escape from the pains of reality. The gates only unlocked when we are together.

I start crawling like I'm a lioness—a tired lioness, my bed my cave. Lilly watches in amusement and admiration. I never put on any clothes, now cross faded and delusional. No worries, no fears, no resentment. I was a lioness in my head strutting my ass to bed. Lilly eventually followed me to the room to tuck me in. She kissed me on the forehead as a nurturing mother would, I smile and turnover, wrapping myself deeper into the blankets. The last thing heard is the shower water running. The last thing seen were her blue eyes, just like the ocean waves rocking me to sleep.

Heat is coming from in between my legs.

A moist and hot sensation going in circles around my labia majora. Sweet surrender, I'm paralyzed in my sleep. My body is unable to move, my legs are unable to shake in much needed pleasure. Am I dreaming? This felt so real. She continues, moving her tongue to my clit, humming and rocking in one steady eye rolling motion. I needed this, and she knew it. She always knew. I gasp for air, now realizing that I'm awake, as she presses her tongue harder and hums louder. The vibrations sending my body into a state of shock. This is so much better than my vibrator, I thought. Her soft gentle hands grazing my body, tickling me slowly and exciting my senses. She was a siren, the master seducer, offering total release from the limitations of my life. Her presence was always sexually charged and heightened with desire, and she was in between my legs embodying my fantasy. My body submerged in euphoria, my thoughts only making her effect on me stronger. Her sexual energy like a wave washing over me, pulling me underneath, making me slowly sink into her control. I've never felt like this before, her pretty pink tongue licking my pretty pink lips as if it were her dying wish.

I shuddered, letting out moans load enough to disturb the apartment next door. I came harder than my Jamaican lover could ever achieve. Warm sweat dripping down my body shuddering in ecstasy her bubblegum tongue still licking, tasting me. I bit my lips in pleasure and tell her to turn over. I never eaten yoni before; however, I knew how to please a woman. My request sparked her eyes with surprise and delight. I always played hard to get, and she was happy for my final submission. I’m ecstatic, finally able to caress and please my soulmate, my hot and cold tactic of seduction paying off much better than I expected. I kiss and nibble her down to her belly button. “Would you like that?” I ask her, gently going lower causing her to squirm. “Tell me you would like that,” regaining my control as I stimulate her clit. She moans, “Yes,” as I start to run my tongue across her yoni, listening to her body, connecting to her desires. Licking very gently on her clit before using the full force of my tongue. Slowly spelling her name out, while humming the fastest EDM beat I could think of, her pink flesh turning red as she blushes. Tasting and smelling like...bacon? I stop, confused and taste her again. It’s definitely bacon, I look up to see her body no longer there.

I wake up in a state of anxiety, the aroma of breakfast taking over the morning air. So, I was smelling bacon. My wet dream leaving the hugest wet spot in history on my bed. I hurry to shower, now feeling a mixture of dissatisfaction and inner peace. Conflicting, but fitting.