"Make mine a double!" This must be my favourite phrase when on a night out and on this occasion it cam back to haunt me.
4 years ago, I was free, single, and looking for what ever I could get. This particular night out was no different. It was 2am, the drinks had been flowing for roughly 8 hours, and me and my mates (those that were left) were barely able to stand up.
I don't usually smoke but having gone outside for a breather, I was offered a ciggy from a rather attractive young lady. Safe to say I accepted with the opportunity of a conversation. Two minutes later she had gone, she was in a taxi with her mates, never to be seen again.
Finishing my fag, I was lent on by a woman in red. I'm not talking a red dress or anything remotely flattering but red leather trousers, red sparkling shows and a red jacket. Out of politeness I humoured her and we began to talk, to my surprise she was only 36 but had 6 children. We spoke for 10 minutes until I eyeballed a mate and disappeared back into the club.
After having the piss taken out of me, we went to the bar, double vodkas all around. 4 rounds later I was stood with my one remaining friend who waddled off to the toilet before he went. By now I was ready for home too. I texted my friend to tell him I was off but before I could leave I felt a cold hand grab mine, it was the red woman for before. She looked more attractive due to the extra alcohol I'd consumed. She danced with me under the gaze of a bloke who I'm presuming was with her. This put me on edge due to the drunken jealous look he was throwing at me. Regardless I finished the song and told her I was off. She said they were as well so we ambled to the exit. I flagged a taxi and told her it was fun, with this she kissed the bloke with her and climbed in with me. She reassured the guy that she'd text him in the morning and put her hand on my lap, "in for a penny, in for a pound" I thought and kissed her, as the taxi sped its way to my house her hand had found its way into my boxers and my hand had found her breast.
10 minutes later we pulled up at mine, I put my hard on back in my bottoms and we stumbled up stairs towards my room. When we got there she removed her trousers and her underwear to reveal a very uninviting messy bush. It was light brown and looked forgotten about. I removed my bottoms, boxers, and shirt while she removed the rest of her attire. My 26 year old body opposite her 36 going on 66 year old body—there was only one winner here. She laid on the bed, legs apart, nipple in hand and a smile on her face. I tentatively knelt between her legs and slowly slid myself inside. After a considerable amount of sex I pulled out and after instruction not to hit her face, I covered her in cum. With that we laid and slept.
Less than 1 hour later, I was woken up to find my dick being massaged back to hardness. I was a little less drunk by now and when I looked at her it took a lot more concentration to achieve full arousal. She stroked me for 5 minutes and climbed on me. Not for sex but for something I was dreading. She wanted oral, which made my stomach turn. She shimmied up the bed and straddled my face. I apologised to my tongue and stuck it out. The taste I can remember today and it still makes me feel sick. I looked up and saw she had her head back in delight so I improvised, I used my finger to flick her clit and stroke her lips. It did the trick and she came. She bent over and we had sex doggy style. I came across her back and unbeknown to her, in her hair.
Without rest, she told me to lay back and she began to stroke my wavering dick again. Still sensitive, it sprung back into action against my wishes. She climbed on and awkwardly began to ride me. After 10 minutes she lent down to me and with bad breath told me there's something she's always wanted to try. My mind went to anal but I was wrong. She stopped moving and began to squeeze my dick from inside. She then asked if it was ok to piss on me? As I hesitated to answer due to the shock of her question I felt her squeeze me again. With this I felt a hot sensation on my stomach. She began to bounce on my dick again as she pissed an unreal amount of liquid on me and my bed. Disgusted but close to cumming I let her bounce more, I lifted her off and came on her knee and my stomach. She went to the toilet and I wiped myself down on her jacket.
By now I was aching, smelling, and ready for a shower. I fell asleep with her arse against my soft dick. Another hour passed and I felt her spread her cheeks and direct me to her wide open and by now heavily used hole. I thumbed in my numb soft dick and went through the motions. After 10 minutes I was hard again, she couldn't believe it and wasn't complaining. I put her on her back and went for it, trying hard not to look at her. By now I was nearly fully sober, she looked horrendous, the smell of piss, sex, and fags filled the bedroom. I put so much effort in this time hoping she would be finished after. I could only go for 30 minutes before I came across her chest. With that she wiped her self down and looked at the time, by now it was mid morning and her phone was buzzing. The guy from last night.
She put her damp clothes back on and we said our goodbyes. I was left dirty and sickened by the events of that night. I blame it on the double vodkas and my blood heavy dick. I sauntered back upstairs and inspected my room; there was splashes everywhere, puddles on the bed and her sticky thong on my pillow. I threw my wet quilt out the window, and promptly ordered a new one. I climbed in the shower and stayed there for 45 minutes under unbearably hot water unable to get clean.
I'd like to say I learnt my lesson but as my next story will tell you, I haven't!