Dear Men

What Not to Say When Trying to Convince a Girl to Do Anal

Every woman who has ever had sex with a man has most likely at least once in their life had a conversation with their partner about anal sex. Most men seem to be huge fans of it, while women are either for it or against with the number of women willing to try it growing everyday. Everyone is entitled to their own sex life and as long as both people (or everyone involved) in the act are consenting then I don't really care what other people do in their bedroom, kitchen, car or wherever else they want to have sex. However, what drives me insane is when men start spouting nonsense to women while trying to convince them to have anal sex. Because of this, I put together a list of all the stupid things that men should not say when talking to their partner about having anal sex.

1. Do we really need lube?

My boyfriend of almost a year used to say this when we'd discuss anal, and every single time I shut it down by saying let me take a large object and stick it in your ass, how would you feel? He also shutters and is like noooo. Guys are so quick to push anal sex and want to try it, but they don't always think about lube. Guys tend to have condoms in their wallets but do they ever have lube on them? Forgetting anal for a moment lube is great for vaginal sex too, so guys should really jump on the lube train. Men take it from me having an unlubricated item stuck in your small butt hole is not fun. Unless pain is your thing, then go right on ahead, but if not lube is very important. 

2. It'll hurt more if I pull it out and start over again.

I was watching porn today and the guy in the video said, "Trust me I'm a professional at this." I paused the video and started laughing my ass off. Men unless you have had a penis enter your ass, then you do not know for fact it'll hurt less if you keep going instead of stopping. In fact as a women who has tried both ways before, I can tell you that if it should not hurt or be painful either way. So if your lady is in pain something is wrong so you should pause, assess the situation, and then if both parties want to, continue.

3. It'll hurt less as we go along.

Again, let me say pain is not good! (unless your goal is painful pleasure that is). If a women is in pain ( slight discomfort is normal if not completely relaxed or fully lubricated, but pain is not good) then you should stop until she's comfortable (if she is comfortable) continuing. Again, unless you have inserted an object in your ass don't tell women how it is supposed to feel.

Anal can be great, fun, and sexy but when it's pressured and painful then it is no longer enjoyable. I can honestly say I have never enjoyed anal or any other kind of sex where I felt pressured to do something or was in pain. The best sex is comfortable and enjoyable for both people. So men next time you want to stick your penis in a women's anus please don't say any of those three things. 

Suzie Q

I am a pizza lover, baking enthusiast, and die hard Harry Potter fan. I can quote any Disney song and Harry Potter is live. I've loved writing since I was in seventh grade and am now a junior in college. I'm also a sarcastic sassy bad ass.

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