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Confessions of the 20-Year-Old Semi-Virgin

Am I a prude? Am I just considered ugly? Or do I just have too high of standards?

By K.B.D StevensonPublished 5 years ago 4 min read
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You may wonder what the term semi- virgin actually means. It means someone who has done everything but intercourse. If we went back 60 years, there would be no need for me to write this article, as it was relatively normal to not have your cherry popped by the ripe old age of 20. However, as we are in 2019 I'm either considered a freak of nature or applauded that I have managed to keep my cherry for such a long time. The truth is I don't want either of those things and nor do any other more mature virgins. We are not all pure and innocent or devoutly religious, sometimes it's just the way the cookie crumbles. Although, a lot of us girls are wife material and we have not met someone who is capable of treating us with the integrity that everyone deserves to be treated with. In fact if the right person came along or someone right at that moment we would jump at the opportunity to solve all those curiosities we may have about making love.

Why haven't you done it yet? Is it a series of unfortunate events?

Trust me. We all have our reason but my ultimate personal reason for keeping my cherry in tact is because, I have not met a man who is worth it. That doesn't mean I'm stuck up, I just have standards. I have been in a very short relationship, but unfortunately the man had Justin Bieber bed covers and a bloody cardboard cut out in his bedroom! We we were 18 for god sake! By that point you should know that is NOT how to impress anyone and it definitely is not likely to turn a woman on. But, before I discovered this horrendous fact about my ex boyfriend I did do everything but intercourse. He was also not set on wearing a condom, which is in fact the ultimate deal breaker as I personally think it's so important to be safe. We unfortunately broke up not long after, he stayed at home, I went to uni and no I didn't meet anyone. The thing is with a lot of students, well at my uni, there seems to be a lack of gentleman and those type of guys want nothing to do with the 20-year-old virgin they just want to have a notch on their belt. Too many of my friends have fallen victims to those type of guys and girls and it all ended in tears and lots VK's consumed, personally I prefer gin. So, yes, you could call it a series of unfortunate events.

However, when I went home for summer and had to pay a visit to the nurse, to get the pill which was something I had never done before that point. She applauded me and told me, "Well done, that is a very rare thing." I was 19 at the time, when I went back three-months later just before returning to uni, another nurse devoured me with condom packets and said "in case you get lucky." Of course I kept them, but they likely wont be needed for a while.

What is my life like? How do I cope?

As we can be perceived as rare to find, you may be intrigued about it. To be honest our lives are just like yours, with just less action obviously. I don't chase men and to be fair I'm pretty content with being single, I'm just living my life and getting my degree. I don't expect to be applauded or congratulated and I do not by any means look down on people that have gone all the way as it is quite frankly none of my business. It's just pretty awkward when I play "never have I ever" and I still have a full drink in my hand. However, I do feel like there needs to be a voice for women, men and all other in my position as this subject is just never really spoken about from our perspective and thought it would be interesting to share with the world. Because many people my age are just in sex-centered relationships and don't get to know the actual person. Many people refuse to put labels on relationships and opt for friends with benefits instead which from what I have seen they just cause confusion and make things complicated.

I personally just don't believe in making things unnecessarily complicated. I am also a firm believer in things being done properly, where people can communicate efficiently and stay loyal in relationships which is very hard to come by in the millennial generation, where if you are still a virgin it is very hard to find a romantic relationship as a lot of the relationship is based on sex. I believe this is due to the fact that they are chasing instant gratification not husband or wife material/type of people at my age and that's okay. Although, this doesn't get me down anymore, as I accept that it is not my time and that I shouldn't be penalised for it by anyone. Like the way the majority should not be penalised for choosing to have sex. So overall, you can say my life is just the same as a lot of modern 20-year-old's in the western world just less action.

Some may be offended by this article and that's okay you are entitled to feel how you want about this. I am just sharing my opinion.

humanity
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