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Why I Don’t Regret Having Sex at a Young Age...

And My Reasons for Doing It in the First Place

By Ella PaigePublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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Growing up, I was pretty much stuck on the other end of my parents leash. I was always being supervised, I felt as if I had no freedom whatsoever.

My mom and dad were “happily” married and even though we never once walked into a church on any given Sunday morning, always told me to wait to have sex until marriage. They always told me to respect them, never to say the Lord's name in vain, and many other things they claimed were in the bible but I never had enough knowledge in that area to know if it actually was or not.

Fast forward to my sophomore year of high school. I had just gotten over a nasty breakup with a guy I always thought I would marry. He was never a nice guy, in the two years I was with him he had never once taken my thoughts into consideration over his own. I remember one moment vividly, we were talking and laughing and out of the blue he told me something along the lines of, “If I ever get you pregnant, you have to get an abortion. Theres no way my parents could ever find out.” I can't remember exactly what it was but after that, the entire night was downhill from there.

I had always felt stuck in that relationship. My parents seemed to love him. If only they would’ve know how demanding and hot-headed he was at the time. Eh, they still would’ve chosen him over me any day even if they would’ve had that knowledge.

A few months later, a random message from a cute boy popped up on my phone. Surprisingly, we had gone to junior high together. We didn’t figure that out for awhile, turns out we ran in completely different circles back in those times.

He asked me if I would be interested in seeing a movie with him and though I wasn’t looking or ready for another relationship, I said yes. We went and saw some movie about fast cars and hot girls and I kind of instantly hated him. I knew he was probably going to turn out just like my last boyfriend. So after that date, I stopped responding to him for a little while. He was pretty persistent and I came to terms with the idea that maybe, just maybe, this guy actually cared about me.

After our second date, I decided to give him a go. We dated that entire summer with barely any complications and I was starting to truly fall in love with this guy. He was completely different than what I had previously thought. He was everything a teenage girl could possibly dream of. He had the sex-appeal of any popular movie star, he was older but not by much, and a little on the short side but I could still pull off a pair of heals without towering over him.

The fall and holiday seasons passed and I was happier than ever. I loved him more and more it seemed like, every single day. Unlike my first relationship where it started out slightly chilly and was a full-blown avalanche by the end of it.

Sex had crossed my mind a couple of times but never serious enough to actually consider it or do it. But one day, about two thirds of the way through my junior year, I decided to go for it.

I explained to my boyfriend that it was something I wanted to be special. And for our 9 month anniversary he somehow convinced my parents to let me go camping for one night with him. He drove to a local lake and we sat around a small fire. We roasted marshmallows and swam for what seemed like hours. No one in sight. We laughed so hard we were almost in tears trying to figure out how to set up the tent, and luckily we got it up before the sun set behind the trees. He had brought plenty of blankets, a portable movie player, and a cooler full of sandwich ingredients. We dried off and climbed into our tiny haven. And well, we had sex.

It was everything I had imagined yet the scariest thing I’d ever done.

I was his girlfriend for 11 months after that, a total of 20 months and just under 2 years. And then I became his fiancée. We were married in less than a year and are still going strong 4 years later.

I was ready for what I did.

And there’s not a single regret in my mind.

sexual wellness
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